7 Myths About Making Friends as an Adult (Especially in Indianapolis)

If making friends as an adult feels harder than it should, you’re not imagining it and you’re definitely not alone.

Between work schedules, relationships, family responsibilities, and the general busyness of life, adult friendship can feel confusing, awkward, and sometimes even discouraging. Many women quietly wonder why connection doesn’t come as naturally as it once did.

The truth? A lot of what we believe about adult friendship simply isn’t true.

Let’s talk about some of the biggest myths and what’s actually going on beneath the surface.

Myth 1: “Everyone Already Has Their Group”

It may look like everyone else has their people figured out, but appearances are deceiving.

At BFF Indy events, one of the most common things we hear is: “I almost didn’t come because I thought everyone else would already know each other.” And yet, the majority of women arrive solo, feeling the exact same way.

Many friendships you see today are remnants of earlier life stages: college, past jobs, former neighborhoods. As life changes, those connections often shift or fade, even if it doesn’t look that way from the outside.

Most adults are still looking for meaningful connection. They’re just not always talking about it.

Myth 2: “If I Haven’t Made Close Friends by Now, It’s Too Late”

Friendship doesn’t run on a timeline.

Some of the deepest, most aligned friendships happen later in life, after you’ve experienced change, growth, loss, and transition. At this stage, friendships often become more intentional, rooted in shared values rather than convenience.

You’re not late to the party. You’re simply entering a season where friendship looks more thoughtful and purposeful.

Myth 3: “I Have to Be Outgoing to Make Friends”

There’s a common misconception that friendship belongs to the loudest person in the room.

In reality, many meaningful connections begin quietly... through one-on-one conversations, shared interests, or mutual experiences. You don’t need to be overly social, witty, or charismatic to form real relationships.

At BFF Indy, we believe connection should feel natural, not performative. Showing up as yourself is more than enough.

Myth 4: “Everyone Else Is Confident, I’m the Only One Who Feels Awkward”

Feeling awkward doesn’t mean you don’t belong. It means you’re human.

Walking into a room alone can trigger self-doubt, nerves, and overthinking, even for people who seem confident on the outside. That discomfort is often shared, even if it’s invisible.

In many cases, the very moment you feel unsure is the moment someone else is hoping you’ll say hello.

Myth 5: “Making Friends Should Feel Easy”

Adult friendship isn’t hard because you’re failing at it. It’s hard because life is full.

Friendship now requires coordination, flexibility, and patience. Schedules don’t align perfectly. Energy levels change. Life priorities shift.

Building meaningful connections often takes repeated interactions and shared experiences over time. And that’s normal, not a sign that something is wrong.

Myth 6: “I Need a Lot of Time to Build New Friendships”

Many women assume they don’t have the capacity for new friendships because their calendars already feel full.

But connection doesn’t require constant availability. Sometimes it starts with showing up once a month, sending a message, or recognizing a familiar face the next time you attend an event.

Friendship grows in small, manageable moments, not all at once.

Myth 7: “If It Hasn’t Happened Yet, It Probably Won’t”

This belief quietly keeps so many women stuck.

Connection often happens when you least expect it: when you take one small step outside your comfort zone, say yes to something new, or simply give yourself permission to try again.

Friendship isn’t something you miss out on forever. It’s something you keep opening the door to.

The Truth About Making Friends as an Adult

Adult friendship isn’t about changing who you are. It’s about finding spaces where connection is encouraged, supported, and made easier.

That’s why BFF Indy exists: to remove the pressure, normalize coming alone, and create room for genuine friendships to grow naturally.

If you’ve been craving deeper connection, consider this your reminder: you’re not behind, you’re not alone, and it’s not too late.